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Activity 2-1: Scripts for Dating

PLAN

Summary In this activity students discuss the characteristics of a good date and the characteristics of a bad date. They write scripts based on their discussions and act out the scenes.

Objectives

Students:

\checkmark identify the behaviors, attitudes, and activities that contribute to a positive dating situation.

\checkmark identify the behaviors, attitudes, and activities that contribute to a negative dating situation and how to deal with a bad situation when it arises.

Student Materials

  • One Activity Report per group
  • Props-brought in by the group (Optional)

Teacher Materials

  • Activity Report Answer Key

Advance Preparation

Decide how to group students.

Estimated Time

Day 1-45 minutes

Day 2-45 minutes (If time is limited, you could condense the activity to one day by having the skits presented to small groups only and not to the entire class.)

Interdisciplinary Connections

This activity has Guidance connections. It can be expanded to include:

Art Have students draw a comic book version of a bad date.

Language Arts Ask students to interview their parents or an older sibling about the best and the worst dates that they have experienced.

Math Calculate the costs of several different types of dates-such as going out to dinner and a movie, going to the prom, going to play miniature golf, etc. Don't forget to include any transportation costs, special items such as clothing or flowers, tips, and so on.

Social Studies Look at dating customs in other cultures.

Prerequisites and Background Information

None required

IMPLEMENT

Introduce Activity 2-1 by asking students if they think the dating scenes they see on television are usually successful or disasters. How do they compare to real life? This activity will help them identify those things they can do to help ensure that when the time comes for them to begin dating, they'll have more fun than problems.

Steps 1-2 Review the text section on dating, pages 8-9. Then divide the class into groups of 4. Try to balance groups by sex and by personality. If you have a large class, you may want to have larger groups. Go over the instructions in the student text and distribute the Activity Report. Explain that this activity will take two days. Day 1 is for discussing, planning, and rehearsing. Day 2 is for making presentations to the whole class of the final skits. If you wish to be more elaborate, you can extend the time.

Steps 3-5 As the groups go through the various steps, circulate from group to group to keep them on task and offer suggestions. Set time limits for each part of the activity as you see fit. A suggested time use is as follows: 10 minutes to discuss and answer the questions, 10 minutes to write the scripts, 10 minutes to practice, and 10 minutes to present to the other group members and critique the scenes.

Step 6 On Day 2 give the class 5 minutes to rehearse. Then give each group 3-5 minutes to present its skit. Time may have to be altered if you have a large number of groups. Some classes may require two days to present.

Conclude Activity 2-1 with Step 7-a whole class discussion on dating: how to make it a positive experience, and how to protect yourself from a negative one.

Helpful Hints

Students love to watch themselves act. If possible, videotape the skits on Day two.

ASSESS

Use the scripts and the Activity Report to assess if students can

\checkmark identify the elements that make a good date.

\checkmark identify the elements that make a bad date.

Activity 2-1: Scripts for Dating – Activity Report Answer Key

  • Sample answers to these questions will be provided upon request. Please send an email to teachers-requests@ck12.org to request sample answers.
  1. Asking for a date What is the best way to ask someone for a date? Is one time or place better than another? Is it better on the phone or in person? How does it feel to ask someone on a date? How does it feel to be asked? How can you say no politely? How can you say yes without stumbling on your words? How can you make it easier on the other person? How can you explain if you have to ask your parents first? How do you set the time and the place? Does it always have to be the boy who does the asking?
  2. What makes a good first date? Where could you go? What could you do? Who should make the decisions? Who should pay? How should you treat the other person? How should you let the other person know what's okay and what's not, physically? Should it be an issue on a first date? What can you talk about? How do you end the date? How do you let the other person know you had a good time? How do you behave the next time you see each other? Do boys and girls have the same view of what makes a good date? How can you make sure both people have a good time, not one at the expense of the other?
  3. What makes a bad first date? How could problems arise over the issues of money, time, location, or type of activity? What behaviors might make you or your date uncomfortable? What types of conversations might be a problem? How might one partner pressure the other one? How do you settle conflicts or disagreements about what to do? What do you do if things are going so badly that you feel you need to end the date? How should you be prepared for that possibility? What do you say or do at the end of a bad date? How do you deal with the person when you see each other again? Use the answers to the questions above to write two, 3-minute scripts-one for a good date and one for a bad date. Start with thinking about asking for the date, and go all the way through to the end of the date and talking about it the next day. Write your scripts on binder paper, and refer to your Activity Report for further instructions.

What Do You Think?

People often refer to a chemistry between people. Do you think chemistry in relationships is a function of biology, psychology, or culture? Why?

Activity 2-2: Judging People by Their Looks

PLAN

Summary In this activity students discuss the role of physical attractiveness in selecting friends and forming relationships. They then create posters that guide others in selecting friends and making the most of their own attractive qualities.

Objectives

Students:

\checkmark identify those characteristics, both physical and behavioral, that people in our culture find attractive.

\checkmark decide what role those characteristics have, or should have, in influencing our selection of friends and relationships.

\checkmark examine the role the media and others have in influencing their opinions.

Student Materials

Per group of 4-6 students

  • One copy of Activity Report per group
  • Construction paper or poster paper
  • Markers or crayons

Teacher Materials

  • Activity Report Answer Key

Advance Preparation

Decide how to group students. Gather paper and markers.

Estimated Time 40 minutes

Interdisciplinary Connections

This activity has connections to Guidance. It can be expanded to include:

Visual or Performing Arts Have students create a fashion show of “Do's and Don'ts” (ways to make yourself more or less attractive).

Science Research the field of plastic surgery. Focus on the way that doctors can correct serious birth defects or congenital abnormalities. Then examine plastic surgery for cosmetic purposes. How are the procedures done? What are their costs?

Language Arts Follow up on the research regarding plastic surgery by conducting a debate. Topics might include-Should insurance pay for corrective surgery? Should insurance pay for elective surgery? Should people change their looks if they can afford it?

Social Studies Study views of attractiveness in other cultures, especially those very different from our own. Look at subcultures within your own school that have different opinions of attractiveness.

Prerequisites and Background Information

None required

IMPLEMENT

Introduce Activity 2-2 by asking students what they think would happen to our relationships if we had to know someone well before we were ever able to see what they looked like.

Steps 1-2 Divide the class into groups of 4-6 students. Review Section 2 with them if needed, and go over the Activity instructions in the student text.

Step 3 Distribute the Activity Report and give students 10-15 minutes to discuss and answer the group questions. As the groups answer the questions, circulate around the room, keeping them focused and offering suggestions.

Step 4 When the discussions are finished, ask students to fill in the rough drafts of their posters on the Activity Report. They should show you their ideas before picking up the materials to make their posters. Some classes may require more than one class period to complete the posters, or they could be completed as homework.

Step 5 When all posters have been completed, ask one member of each group to present the group poster. Have the class look for similarities.

Conclude Activity 2-2 with a discussion on the role of looks in forming relationships.

ASSESS

Use the poster and the responses on the Activity Report to assess if students can

\checkmark identify characteristics considered attractive in this culture.

\checkmark determine how those views are shaped.

Activity 2-2: Judging People by Their Looks – Activity Report Answer Key

  • Sample answers to these questions will be provided upon request. Please send an email to teachers-requests@ck12.org to request sample answers.
  1. Discuss the following questions and record the group answers in the space below. What makes someone attractive? Is it physical appearance? Personality? Do boys and girls have different opinions? Do all boys think alike? Do all girls? Is being sexually attractive the same thing as being generally attractive? Is being attractive the same thing as being beautiful or being handsome?
  2. Is sexual attractiveness important in friendships? What characteristics do you look for in a friend? Are more of those characteristics physical or behavioral? What counts more?
  3. What elements of attractiveness does a person have control over? What elements do they not? How can people maximize their strong points? What do we do when people judge us for things over which we have no control? What can we say to them? How do we let them know when their comments hurt?
  4. Do we have any control over how we feel about what is attractive and what isn't? What are some of the things that might influence our view of attractiveness? What about the roles of parents or peers? What about the role of advertisers in setting the standards? What is their real goal? Why might it be dangerous or harmful to accept their standards?

What Is the Difference? Students explain what different terms for love mean (puppy love, infatuation, crush, love).

Activity 2-3: What Happens When You Are in Love?

PLAN

Summary In this activity students discuss the difference between liking, loving, and being in love. They think about the way these different feelings affect behavior and create skits to show those differences.

Objectives

Students:

\checkmark determine the difference among liking, loving, and being in love.

\checkmark demonstrate they know that our behavior changes in each of these circumstances.

Student Materials

  • One copy of Activity Report per group

Teacher Materials

  • Activity Report Answer Key

Advance Preparation

Decide how to group students.

Estimated Time

Day 1-40-45 minutes

Day 2-40-45 minutes (If time is limited, you can condense the activity to one day by having the skits presented within the small groups only and not to the entire class.)

Interdisciplinary Connections

This activity has connections to Guidance. It can be expanded to include:

Visual or Performing Arts Have students write a love song, or create a dance that reflects romance.

Language Arts Students can collect examples from literature of famous romantic couples.

  • Have them read Romeo and Juliet or watch the movie West Side Story and look at the behavior of the young lovers.
  • Ask students to compile an annotated bibliography of books that they have read in three categories-books about friends, books about love, books about being in love.

Prerequisites and Background Information

None required

IMPLEMENT

Introduce Activity 2-3 by asking students to think quietly about someone that they like as a friend. Next, have them quietly think about a family member or friend that they love. Finally, ask them to picture someone with whom they are in love, or someone they might like to be in love with some day. Ask them to notice the difference in the way that each of those people makes them feel.

Step 1 Divide the class into groups of 6 students, when possible. Try to balance the groups by sex and by personality. Review Section 2, if needed. Go over instructions in student text. Explain that this activity will take two days. Day 1 is used for discussing, planning, and rehearsing. Day 2 is used for making presentations to the whole class of the final skits. If you wish to be more elaborate, you can extend the time. Distribute the Activity Report.

Steps 2-5 As the groups answer the questions, circulate around the room, keeping them focused and offering suggestions. Set time limits for each part of the activity as you see fit. A suggested time use is as follows: 10 minutes to discuss and answer the questions, 10 minutes to write the scripts, 10 minutes to practice, and 10 minutes to present to the other group members and critique the scenes.

Step 6 On Day 2 give the class 5 minutes to rehearse. Then give each group 3 minutes to present its skit. Time may have to be altered if you have a large number of groups. Some classes may require two days to present.

Helpful Hints

Students love to see themselves on film. If possible, videotape the presentations.

Conclude Activity 2-3 with Step 7, which is a whole class discussion on the good and bad points of each type of feeling.

ASSESS

Use the performance of the skit and the responses on the Activity Report to assess if students can

\checkmark determine the differences among liking, loving, and being in love.

\checkmark identify the behavior changes in each level of affection.

Activity 2-3: What Happens When You're in Love? – Activity Report Answer Key

  • Sample answers to these questions will be provided upon request. Please send an email to teachers-requests@ck12.org to request sample answers.

Discuss the following sets of questions and record the group answers in the spaces provided.

  1. Friendship What does it mean to like someone as a friend? How do you behave toward someone that you like? In what ways, how often, and under what circumstances do you think about them? What are you willing to do for them? What do you expect from them? Under what circumstances are you mad at or jealous of your friends? How do you feel when they go away? Do you have a realistic view of your friends? Are you patient with them? What kinds of thoughts and feelings do you share with your friends? Do you trust them? Do you always agree with them?
  2. Love What does it mean to love someone? How is it different from being a friend? How does it change your feelings and your behavior? Who are you likely to love? What is special about the people you love, as opposed to the people you are just friends with? In what ways, how often, and under what circumstances do you think about people that you love? What are you willing to do for them? What do you expect from them? Under what circumstances are you mad at or jealous of them? How do you feel when they go away? Do you have a realistic view of your loved ones? Are you patient with them? What kinds of thoughts and feelings do you share with them? Do you trust them? Do you always agree with them?
  3. Being in Love What does it mean to be in love? How is it different from loving someone? How is it different from friendship? Is there a physical response to being in love? Does it affect how you feel about yourself? About others? About your future? About the world around you? How does it change your feelings and your behavior? Who are you likely to love? What is special about the people you are in love with, as opposed to the people you love, or are just friends with? In what ways, how often, and under what circumstances do you think about someone you're in love with? What are you willing to do for them? What do you expect from them? Under what circumstances are you mad at or jealous of them? How do you feel when they go away? Do you have a realistic view of someone you're in love with? Are you patient with them? What kinds of thoughts and feelings do you share with them? Do you trust them? Do you always agree with them?
  4. Liking, Loving, Being in Love Is one feeling better than another? Is it better to have a friend, have someone love you, or be in love? What if you had to choose? Do we need all three things in our life? What are the positive things about these feelings? Is there a negative side to any of these feelings?

Love Designs Students design a line of cards about love.

Love Is in the Air Students write down the names of songs they hear about love and indicate whether they deal with intimacy, passion, and/or commitment.

What Do You Think?

What reasons might keep you in a relationship in which you otherwise would not be involved?

What Do You Think?

Why is the divorce rate so high in this country? Take into account the three components of love in your thinking.

Debate! Students debate the following sentence. “Humans should choose one mate for life.”

What Do You Think?

Do you think males and females think about love and sex in different ways? Explain how and why.

Combining Sex and love Students make a chart on the board that shows the positive and negative aspects of the three different ways of combining sex and love.

What do you think about dating? Let's say you were in charge of dating at your school, and you could create any system you wanted, what would you do? What would the purpose of dating be? What aspects of dating that currently exist would you promote? Eliminate?

Review Questions/Answers

  • Sample answers to these questions will be provided upon request. Please send an email to teachers-requests@ck12.org to request sample answers.
  1. What factors influence an adolescent's readiness to date?
  2. What are three positive aspects of dating and three negative aspects of dating?
  3. How can you explain the development of sexual interest during adolescence?
  4. What are the three components of love?
  5. What is the difference between romantic love and consummate love?
  6. What are three relationships of love and sex?

Activity 2-1 Report: Scripts for Dating (Student Reproducible)

1. Asking for a date

What is the best way to ask someone for a date? Is one time or place better than another? Is it better on the phone or in person? How does it feel to ask someone on a date? How does it feel to be asked? How can you say no politely? How can you say yes without stumbling on your words? How can you make it easier on the other person? How can you explain if you have to ask your parents first? How do you set the time and the place? Does it always have to be the boy who does the asking?

2. What makes a good first date?

Where could you go? What could you do? Who should make the decisions? Who should pay? How should you treat the other person? How should you let the other person know what's okay and what's not, physically? Should it be an issue on a first date? What can you talk about? How do you end the date? How do you let the other person know you had a good time? How do you behave the next time you see each other? Do boys and girls have the same view of what makes a good date? How can you make sure both people have a good time, not one at the expense of the other?

3. What makes a bad first date?

How could problems arise over the issues of money, time, location, or type of activity? What behaviors might make you or your date uncomfortable? What types of conversations might be a problem? How might one partner pressure the other one? How do you settle conflicts or disagreements about what to do? What do you do if things are going so badly that you feel you need to end the date? How should you be prepared for that possibility? What do you say or do at the end of a bad date? How do you deal with the person when you see each other again?

Use the answers to the questions above to write two, 3-minute scripts, one for a good date, and one for a bad date. Start with thinking about asking for the date, and go all the way through to the end of the date and talking about it the next day. Write your scripts on binder paper, and refer to your Activity sheet for further instructions.

Activity 2-2 Report: Judging People by Their Looks (Student Reproducible)

Discuss the following questions and record the group answers in the space below.

What makes someone attractive? Is it physical appearance? Personality? Do boys and girls have different opinions? Do all boys think alike? Do all girls? Is being sexually attractive the same thing as being generally attractive? Is being attractive the same thing as being beautiful or being handsome?

Is sexual attractiveness important in friendships? What characteristics do you look for in a friend? Are more of those characteristics physical or behavioral? What counts more?

What elements of attractiveness does a person have control over? What elements do they not? How can people maximize their strong points? What do we do when people judge us for things over which we have no control? What can we say to them? How do we let them know when their comments hurt?

Do we have any control over how we feel about what is attractive and what isn't? What are some of the things that might influence our view of attractiveness? What about the roles of parents or peers? What about the role of advertisers in setting the standards? What is their real goal? Why might it be dangerous or harmful to accept their standards?

Use the space below to make notes for the two posters.

What to Look for in a Friend Making the Most of Who You Are

Activity 2-3 Report: What Happens When You're in Love? (Student Reproducible)

Discuss the following sets of questions and record the group answers in the spaces provided.

1. Friendship

What does it mean to like someone as a friend? How do you behave toward someone that you like? In what ways, how often, and under what circumstances do you think about them? What are you willing to do for them? What do you expect from them? Under what circumstances are you mad at or jealous of your friends? How do you feel when they go away? Do you have a realistic view of your friends? Are you patient with them? What kinds of thoughts and feelings do you share with your friends? Do you trust them? Do you always agree with them?

2. Love

What does it mean to love someone? How is it different from being a friend? How does it change your feelings and your behavior? Who are you likely to love? What is special about the people you love, as opposed to the people you are just friends with? In what ways, how often, and under what circumstances do you think about people that you love? What are you willing to do for them? What do you expect from them? Under what circumstances are you mad at or jealous of them? How do you feel when they go away? Do you have a realistic view of your loved ones? Are you patient with them? What kinds of thoughts and feelings do you share with them? Do you trust them? Do you always agree with them?

3. Being in Love

What does it mean to be in love? How is it different from loving someone? How is it different from friendship? Is there a physical response to being in love? Does it affect how you feel about yourself? About others? About your future? About the world around you? How does it change your feelings and your behavior? Who are you likely to love? What is special about the people you are in love with, as opposed to the people you love, or are just friends with? In what ways, how often, and under what circumstances do you think about someone you're in love with? What are you willing to do for them? What do you expect from them? Under what circumstances are you mad at or jealous of them? How do you feel when they go away? Do you have a realistic view of someone you're in love with? Are you patient with them? What kinds of thoughts and feelings do you share with them? Do you trust them? Do you always agree with them?

4. Liking, Loving, Being in Love

Is one feeling better than another? Is it better to have a friend, have someone love you, or be in love? What if you had to choose? Do we need all three things in our life? What are the positive things about these feelings? Is there a negative side to any of these feelings?

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